Friday, 2 October 2015

Vijaykanth is back

Vijaykanth went to a bank to open a S.B.  A/C.

After seeing the Form he went to Delhi for filling it up.
You know why?

Form said: 'Fill Up In Capital.'
***  

Vijaykanth standing below a tube light with open mouth.
Why?

Because his doctor advised him: 'Today's dinner should be light !'
***

On romantic date vijaykanth's gf asks him:
'Darling ! On our engagement will you give me a ring?'

He said: 'Sure ! What's your phone no.?'
***

Vijaykanth found the answer to the most difficult question ever.
What will come first, chicken or egg?

what ever u order first will come first.
***

Teacher told all students to write an essay on a cricket match.
All were busy writing except vijaykanth

He wrote:'Due To Rain, No Match!'

***
What does vijaykanth do after taking a  Xerox?

He will compare it with the original for any spelling mistakes.
***

Vijaykanth & wife buy coffee in a shop.
Vijaykanth: Drink quickly before it gets cold.

Wife: Why?
Vijaykanth: Hot coffee $5 and cold coffee $10.

*****
Manager asked vijaykanth at an interview.

Can you spell a word that has more than 100 letters in it?
Vijaykanth replied: -P-O-S-T-B-O- X

***
After returning back from a foreign trip, vijaykanth asked his wife,
Do I look like a foreigner?

Wife: No! Why?
Vijaykanth: In London a lady asked me Are you a foreigner?

****
Lecturer: write a note on Gandhi Jayanthi
Vijaykanth writes, "Gandhi was a great man, but I don't know who is Jayanthi.

***
Interviewer: just imagine you are on the3rd floor, it caught fire and how will you escape?
Vijaykanth: its simple. I will stop my imagination!!!

***
Vijaykanth: My mobile bill how much?
Call centre girl: sir, just dial 123to know current bill status

Vijaykanth: Stupid, not CURRENT BILL my MOBILE BILL.
**** 

Friend: I got a brand new Ford IKON for my wife!
Vijaykanth: Wow!!! That's an unbelievable exchange offer!!
 
***

Teacher: "What is common between JESUS, KRISHNA , RAM, GANDHI and BUDHA?"
Vijaykanth: "All are born on government holidays...!!!

***
Sir: What is difference between Orange and Apple?
Vijaykanth: Color of Orange is orange, but color of Apple is not APPLE

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